The person I want to be

"Forever is a long time, but I wouldn't mind spending it by your side."

Are there times when you seriously get really....lonely?
The moments when you feel no one really understands you, including yourself.

Ya. :l

So I'm a horrible actor. For me to act like everything's fine, I put on the over crazy side.

I don't really know who I am and what I'm supposed to do. I put myself before others a lot of the time. And I feel my biggest flaw is my mouth; it curses, it demolishes, it lies, it stings.

I'm sorry to have such a sad blog, but I feel like I can't put it anywhere else.

When will I learn? I pray and pray for help that, you know, God will change my heart.

But, it takes forever. It's painful, and it feels like sometimes I just won't make it.

I'm tired of feeling lonely and wallowing in self pity.

Why can't I be the person I want to be. Like Paul says, "I do the things I don't want to do, and I don't do the things I want to do."

I forget where that is, but it's there.

Why can't I be the person I want to be?